Robber met animalsSaturday, April 26th, 2008 with No Comments »

Late one night, a burglar broke into a house he thought was empty.
He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say: “Jesus is watching you!”
Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again.
“Jesus is watching you,” the voice boomed […]

Excuse for speedingFriday, April 25th, 2008 with No Comments »

A cop pulls a car over on the highway for speeding. When he asks for the driver’s license, the driver argued, “Speeding??? But officer, I was only trying to keep a safe distance between my car the the car in back of me.”

He is extremely drunkThursday, April 24th, 2008 with No Comments »

Late one Friday night the policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening.
“Aye, so I have. ‘Tis Friday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints. […]

Problem with a dogWednesday, April 23rd, 2008 with No Comments »

Police officer: Excuse me, but your dog has been chasing a man on his bicycle.
Dog owner: Are you crazy? My dog can’t even ride a bicycle.

Catch a drunk driverTuesday, April 22nd, 2008 with No Comments »

Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud.
The passenger, Bubba, said “Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it’s a police roadblock!! We’re gonna get busted fer drinkin’ these here beers!!”
“Don’t worry, Bubba,” Earl said. “We’ll just pull over and finish drinkin’ these beers then peel off the […]

Undercover detectiveMonday, April 21st, 2008 with No Comments »

A tourist asks a man in uniform, “Are you a policeman?”
“No, I am an undercover detective.”
“So why are you in uniform?”
“Today is my day off.”

Police are in a chaseSunday, April 20th, 2008 with No Comments »

Two Alabama State Troopers were chasing a Camaro East on I-20 toward Georgia. When the suspect crossed the Georgia line, the first Trooper pulled over quickly.
The rookie Trooper pulled in behind him and said, “Hey, sarge, why did you stop?”
The sarge replied, “He’s in Georgia now. They’re an hour ahead of us, so we’ll never […]

Rookie is on the jobSaturday, April 19th, 2008 with No Comments »

A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering.
The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner.
The rookie rolled down his window and said, “Let’s get off the […]

Don’t arrest the judgeFriday, April 18th, 2008 with No Comments »

A squad car driver was covering a quiet beat out in the sticks when he was amazed to find a former lieutenant on the police force covering the beat.
He stopped the car and asked, “Why, Irish Mike, this wouldn’t be your new beat out here in the sticks, would it?”
“That it is, “Irish Mike replied […]

Working in the gardenThursday, April 17th, 2008 with No Comments »

A prisioner in jail received a letter from his wife:
“I have decided to plant some lettuce in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?”
The prisioner, knowing that the prison guards read all the mail, replied in a letter:
“Dear Wife, whatever you do, DO NOT touch the back garden! […]