A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient, “How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?” He got the following reply.
“Well, it all started when I got married and I guess I should never have done it. I married a widow with a grown daughter who then became […]
They were married, but since the argument they had a few days earlier, they hadn’t been talking to each other.
Instead, they were giving each other written notes.
One evening he gave her a paper where it said:
“Wake me up tomorrow morning at 6 am.”
The next morning he woke up and saw that it was 9 o’clock.
Naturally […]
10. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about cooking.
9. Today is our what?
8. Okay, let’s celebrate, but do we have to celebrate together?
7. I thought we only celebrated important events?
6. You can celebrate anniversaries with your next husband.
5. You don’t like what I pick out, so I thought why bother.
4. I got […]
The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free.
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. — Groucho Marx
The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and […]
It’s not what you say, but the way you say it.
On a blind date, the boy said to the girl: “Time stands still when I look into your eyes.”
The girl was very flattered.
What the boy had really meant was, “You have a face that would stop a clock.”
How have times changed?
In olden times, it is reported that sacrifices were made at the altar.
Since then, weddings have been held there, and times haven’t changed at all!
After shopping for most of the day, a couple returns to find their car has been stolen. They go to the police station to make a full report. Then, a detective drives them back to the parking lot to see if any evidence can be found at the scene of the crime. To their amazement, […]
I’m currently running the latest version of GirlFriend and I’ve been having some problems lately. I’ve been running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1.0 forever as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I’ve tried have always conflicted with it.
I hear that DrinkingBuddies won’t crash if GirlFriend is run in background mode and the […]
Q: Why do reindeer and Santa have red noses?
A: They are not equipped with ABS and thus tend to bump into things on slippery surfaces. This is why Santa is often seen with a red nose (the sleigh doesn’t have an airbag, either).
The lovers passionately embraced on her bed, their bodies fused together as they gyrated to their own tattoo.
The woman cocked her ear, “Quick! My husband’s coming through the front door! Hide in the bathroom!” she cried.
The lover ran into the bathroom as she hid his clothes under the bed and as she turned back, her […]