Little Nancy was in the backyard filling in a hole when her neighbour peered
over the fence. Interested in what the girl was up to he asks, “What are you up
to there Nancy?”
“My goldfish died,” replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, “and I’ve
just buried him.”
The neighbour was concerned, “That’s an awfully big hole for a goldfish, […]
A manager in a big company needed to contact one of his employees about an
urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee’s home
phone number and was greeted with a child’s whispered voice on the first ring,
“Hello?”
“Is your Daddy home?” the boss quickly asked. “Yes”, whispered the small
voice. May I talk with […]
A little girl and her mother were out and about. Out of the blue, the girl
asked her mother, “Mommy, How old are you?” The mother responded, “Honey, women
don’t talk about their age. You’ll learn this as you get older.” The girl then
asked, “Mommy, how much do you weigh?” Her mother responded again, “That’s
another thing women […]
Little melissa comes home from first grade and tells her father that they
learned about the history of valentine’s day. “since valentine’s day is for a
christian saint and we’re jewish,” she asks, “will god get mad at me for giving
someone a valentine?”
melissa’s father thinks a bit, then says “no, i don’t think god would get mad.
who […]
Once there was a little boy who lived in the country. They had to use an
outhouse, and the little boy hated it because it was hot in the summer,cold in
the winter and stank all the time. The outhouse was sitting
on the bank of a creek and the boy determined that one day he would push […]
“We spend the first twelve months of our children’s
lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next
twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up.”
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer
in public schools.
Little Jimmy bit his fingernails all the time. His parents tried everything to
get him to stop, but to no avail. Finally, his mother, exasperated, decided to
tell him a little white lie to get him to stop.
“Jimmy,” she said, “You’d better stop biting your fingernails. If you don’t,
then those fingernails will pile up inside your stomach […]
One day a boy asked his mother for 100 dollars to buy a toy. She said NO. So
he wrote a letter to GOD asking for a 100 dollars. When the letter got to the
post office they figured that GOD meant the president. So they sent the letter
to the white house. The president read it and […]
10. Likes people that oppress him: teachers, parents, principals, police, and
authority figures.
9. Is overly enthusiastic about ‘Dungeons and Dragons’ and other role playing
games.
8. Very familiar with megahertz, wears glasses and, can quote scripture.
7. Frequently speaks of martial arts, but still gets beaten up.
6. Says ‘Whom’ instead of ‘Who.’
5. Is pleased when disruptive individuals are sent […]