How Women Are Better Than Dogs
It is socially acceptable to have sexual relations with a woman.
Women look good in sweaters.
Women leave the room to fart.
Though they only have two, women’s breasts are far more interesting.
An American woman, a British woman, and an Italian woman were having lunch.
The American woman said, “I told my husband that I wasn’t going to clean the
house anymore. If he wanted it clean, he would have to do it himself. After the
first day, I didn’t see anything. The second day I didn’t see anything. Then, […]
A rich, lonely widow decided that she needed another man in her life, so she
placed a personal ad that read: Rich Widow Looking for Man to Share Life and
Fortune with the Following Qualifications:
1. WON’T BEAT ME UP
2. WON’T RUN AWAY
3. HAS TO BE GREAT IN BED
For several months, her phone rang off the hook, her […]
An old woman is riding the elevator in a very lavish New York City Office
Building. A young and beautiful woman gets into the elevator and smelling like
expensive perfume turns to the old woman and says arrogantly, “Giorgio - Beverly
Hills, $100 an ounce!”
The next young and beautiful woman gets on the elevator and also very
arrogantly turns […]
T-Shirt Sayings for Women Who Take No Crap
I’m busy. You’re ugly. Have a nice day.
Warning: I have an attitude and I know how to use it.
Remember my name - you’ll be screaming it later.
Of course I don’t look busy … I did it right the first time.
Why do people with closed minds always open their […]
As the Broadway showgirls were dressing for a performance, one of them noticed
her friend was no longer sporting a flashy engagement ring. “What happened,
Lily?” she asked, pointing to the bare finger. “The wedding off?”
“ Yeah,” Lily admitted. “I saw him in a bathing suit last week, and he looked
so different without his wallet.”
In her own eyes, Julia was the most popular girl around. “A lot of men are
going to be totally miserable when I marry.”
“ Really?” said her date, “And just how many men are you intending to marry?”
A young woman was preparing a ham dinner. After she cut off the end of the
ham, she placed the ham in a pan for baking.
Her friend asked her, “Why did you cut off the end of the ham”?
And she replied, “I really don’t know but my mother always did, so I thought
you were supposed to.”
Later […]
Why Coffee is Better than Women - Part II
23.If you put chocolate in your coffee, it doesn’t put on weight.
24.No matter how ugly you are, you can always get a cup of coffee.
25.A big cup or small cup? It doesn’t matter.
26.Your coffee doesn’t talk to you.
27.Coffee smells good in the morning.
28.Coffee is good when it’s […]
Why Coffee is better than Women - Part I
1.You don’t have to put cream in your coffee to make it taste good.
2.Coffee doesn’t complain when you put whipped cream in it.
3.A cup of coffee looks good in the morning.
4.You won’t fall asleep after a cup of coffee.
5.You can always warm coffee up.
6.Coffee comes with endless […]