And here’s another! Well it’s actually an AP headline: “Philippine leader gets
rare Bush dinner.” I know, I’m a twelve year-old boy, you don’t have to tell me.
I’m giggling like a schoolboy after hearing the word “titmouse”. Haha…
titmouse.

Why doesn’t Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives?
Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush.

January 20: take oath to uphold the honor and dignity of the office of
president of the united states. nudge rehnquist, ask what he’s wearing under
that dress.
january 23: award presidential medal of freedom to ralph nader.
january 24: help alec baldwin pack.
january 30: memo to jeb: in your face, poindexter!
january 31: get people working on stuff.
february 3: […]

Told to me by my father, who heard it from his cousin?
  Gorbachev is hard at work on his country’s budget. His secretary
Knocks on the door. “Mr. Secretary, the–”
  “Not now, I’m busy!”
  “But…”
  “Net! Come back in two hours.”
  Thirty seconds later, she knocks again. “Mr. Secretary, the
Phone… you must answer it.”
  “Can’t you […]

The winner in this year’s $1 million prize in the Pillsbury Bake-Off is a
Cream Cheese Brownie Pie created by Roberta Sonefeld from Hopkins, South
Carolina. This pie is so rich; George W. Bush asked it for a campaign
contribution.
During the Republican primaries, George W. Bush spent his campaign money at a
rate of $200,000 a day and broke […]

(instrumental intro)
Bush wants the whole world… in his hand.
Bush wants the whole wide world… in his hand.
Bush wants the whole world… in his hand.
Bush wants the whole world in his hand.
Bush wants a war for his father, understand?
Bush wants a war for his father, understand?
Bush wants a war for his father, understand?
Bush wants the whole […]

Faker jet figher (faker jet fighter)…
(instrumental intro)
Shrub’s comin’ at em, with his tail hook.
Let’s give him jeers of spite; Bush is still a schnook.
The press will grovel to this man, in fear
Of his right wing mob.
But the world sees a faker jet fighter…
Faker jet fighter.
Mr. Smirk’s fake glory on TV was planned.
Of the world, Dull […]

George W. Bush was standing in an airport lobby when he noticed a man in a
long flowing white robe, with long white hair and white beard. The man held a
staff in one hand and had some stone tablets under his other arm.
Approaching the man, George W. inquired, “Pardon me, but aren’t you Moses?”
Ignoring George W., […]

Al Gore and George W. Bush were seated for lunch in a Washington restaurant.
The attractive waitress approached them to take their orders.
“I’ll have a ham sandwich,” said Gore.
“For you sir?” she asked Bush. “How about a quickie,” Bush replied.
“Governor!”, she exclaimed. “How rude, and to think, you’re not even President
yet!”
As she stormed off, Gore leaned […]

One night, George W. Bush was awakened by the ghost of George Washington.
Bush asked, “George, now that I have been elected President, what is the best
thing I can do for the country?”
“Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did,” advised Washington.
The next night, Bush was awakened by the ghost of Thomas Jefferson.
“Tom, now […]