The Taco Bell Chihuahua, a Doberman and a Bulldog are in a bar having adrink when a great-looking female Collie comes up to them and says, “Whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me.”
So the Doberman says, “I love liver and cheese.” The Collie replies, “That’s not good enough.”
The Bulldog says, […]

So there was this guy at the bar, and he looks over at this other guy sitting there who has a small one-foot man on the counter playing the piano. He scratches his head in wonder, then orders a beer.
Then the guy leans over and says, “If you rub that bottle over there, a genie […]

Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
Yes, pregnancy.

How do you fit 500 babies in a shoebox?
Cuisineart.

Should I have a baby after 35?
No, 35 children is enough.

How do you put a baby in a blender?
Feet first, so you can watch the expression on his face.

Do I have to have a baby shower?
Not if you change the baby’s diaper very quickly.

What does it mean when the baby’s head is crowning?
It means you feel as though not only a crown but the entire throne is trying to make its way out of you.

When is the best time to get an epidural?
Right after you find out you’re pregnant

What is the best time to wean the baby from nursing?
When you see teeth marks.