Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, a tub of cottage cheese, says to them, “We don’t serve your kind in here.” One of the yogurt cartons says back to him, “Why not? We’re cultured individuals.”
There was a woman with three virgin daughters. She set them up with three men to take their virginity. So on that night, the daughters were each in a room. One was screaming, one was moaning, and one was quiet. The next day the mother gathered her daughters and asked the first one, “Why were… Read More »
“If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up” said the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. “Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?” enquired the teacher with a sneer. “Well, actually I don’t,” said the student, “but I hate to see… Read More »
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Owl. Owl who? Owl aboard!
What’s the difference between a man and Bigfoot? One is covered with matted hair and smells awful. The other has big feet.
A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “Ill bet you $50 that I can bite my right eye.” The bartender agrees to take the bet, so the man removes his glass eye, puts the eye in his mouth, and bites it. “Thats not fair,” says the bartender., “How was I to… Read More »
Two guys are talking over a beer, discussing various sex positions. The first guy says, “My favorite position is the rodeo position.” “What is the rodeo position, and how do you do that?” asks the second man. The first guy explains, “Well, first you tell your wife to get on the bed on all fours,… Read More »
A guy walked into a restaurant and asked for some broccoli. The waiter said, Sorry, theres no broccoli. So the man asked for a meat pie and broccoli. The waiter said, “There is no broccoli.” So he asked for a meat pie, chips, and broccoli. The waiter replied, Spell cat, as in catastrophe. C-A-T, the… Read More »
A very handsome and even more confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and cant help but ask, “Is your date running late?” “No,” he replies, “I… Read More »